Newsletter for November, 2015
From Our Minister:
From Our Sabbatical Minister: A Radical Gratitude
A few weeks ago I bought a new journal. I love the feeling of possibility that comes from those fresh, clean, blank pages. The cover of the journal says “In everything, give thanks.”
I was drawn to that. I love the idea of living into a deep gratitude. But as I reflected on it, that notion “In everything, give thanks,” seems incredibly naive. Each week the headlines we live with are filled with more harm done to the planet and her people.
• Mass shootings
• Deaths in the Middle East
• The California drought
I picked up that blue and red notebook, with those hopeful words, and wondered, How to give thanks in the midst of this?
We come to this congregation to talk about tough stuff. You may have wandered in because your heart breaks for our planet. Because you long for a place to belong. Because you need to know that how you live your life makes a difference.
Unitarian Universalism isn’t an easy religion. Yes, we offer a wide embrace of liberal theological beliefs. Yes, we offer a wide welcome to all who honor the worth and dignity of every being. But we ask our members to take a radical stance, one that isn’t so easy if you are paying attention. We ask you to look squarely in the face of injustices of this world—and find a way to give thanks.
Re-connecting with a sense of gratitude can help us move forward when times are tough. When it seems like we cannot possibly hear about one more shooting. One more animal going extinct. One more person diagnosed with a life-threatening illness.
Part of the work we do together at UU Santa Monica is find ways to connect with gratitude in our lives. To meet the struggles of the day with a sense of hope. To remind each other that though the arc of the universe is long, is does indeed bend toward justice.
May you find multiple ways to express your gratitude for each other, and for UU Santa Monica, in the coming days.
Yours, for a time,
Rev. Tera Little
From Our President:
Listening and Talking Compassionately
Our much anticipated workshop on “Connecting our Community through Listening and Talking Compassionately with One Another” took place in Forbes Hall on Saturday, October 3. It was an all day workshop with 61 people attending. Sue Stoyanoff and I along with the Committee on Ministry and the Board worked very hard to bring this important workshop to the congregation as part of our effort in the realm of Right Relations*. By all accounts it was very successful. Mary Mackenzie was a very effective facilitator. Attendees were engaged and enthused. Social hour after church Sunday morning was abuzz with reflections and enthusiasm for what we learned.
The day went like this: Opening and Introductions; Differentiating between Needs and Feelings, and Needs and Preferences; Self Empathy; Sharing Lunch Together; Empathy for Another Person; Asking for What You Want in a Positive Way. The model for the latter has four steps: Observation (just the facts with no judgment), Feelings (your emotions if appropriate), Need (clarifies why it matters to you), and Request (clarifies what you would like the other person to do — it should be directly related to need). Making a request is very important. This is the foundation of non-violent or compassionate communication. Sound easy? It’s not, but it’s a beginning when you find yourself approaching conversations a little differently — listening more carefully to yourself and others. It’s a place where I would like to be.
There was an exercise that really touched people. We stood in a circle and were invited to step forward with our feelings or fears about speaking up. What scares us about speaking our truth? One person might say, “I am afraid to speak up because I think people will be angry with me.” Those who shared the fear would step in and step back. Many, many stepped in to show that they shared feelings or fears about speaking up, even those who appear confident and sturdy. It was a powerful exercise that moved many people and bound us together.
Mary offered, “Let me know if you’d like to do more work with me. I’d love to come back. If money is the only thing holding you back from calling again, call anyway and we’ll work it out.” What a wonderful endorsement and offer!
http://tinyurl.com/p4elols is a link you may want to explore if you were unable to attend the workshop. Look to the left margin that says “Get Started with NVC.” Below it are many resources, some audio, some video, and articles, whose purpose is to orient people in the Nonviolent Communication “NVC” process. Mary will also be conducting an L.A.-based practice group in November and December and more. The venue is the Veterans Memorial Complex. I’ll share the details once I get them.
I am in Japan as I write this and appreciative that VP Dan Nannini conducted the October Board meeting. Ned is giving a talk at IPMU (Institute for the Physics and Mathematics of the Universe), which is in a suburb of Tokyo called Kashiwa-no-ha. Our hotel room has earthquake supplies in it!
— Patricia Wright
*Caveat: Right Relations is not based on NVC, but compassionate communication is an effective tool to speak the language of right relations.
Featured Articles:
From Our Pledge Committee: Living our Commitment by Funding our Movement
The Civil Rights Movement is an inspiration in so many ways — the women and men who drove each other to work for over a year during the Montgomery bus boycott; the brave youth who integrated the University of Georgia and other southern universities; the people who faced the police on the Edmund Pettis Bridge in Selma.
Searching for new ways to inspire financial giving in our beloved church, I found an article in the Grassroots Fundraising Journal describing how the Civil Rights Movement of the 1950s and 1960s raised the money to pay organizers, print posters and leaflets, feed demonstrators, and cover all the costs of building a massive social movement.
Like all authentic mass movements, nearly all of the funding came from contributions by the housekeepers, sanitation workers, and kitchen staff in the pews of the black churches where nightly meetings were held. The article, by Holly Fincke, quotes Reverend T.J. Jemison, leader and spokesperson for the Baton Rouge 1953 bus boycott as saying “The black citizens, mainly, and a few whites, contributed enough money to pay for all the tires, and batteries, and gas and my bodyguards. And we owed nobody nothing. The black community paid for all that.”
Similar experience in Alabama, Mississippi, and Georgia led one leader to say that it was “the black community that financed efforts aimed at its own liberation.” When funding did eventually come from national foundations, which happened later in the NOVEMBER 8 “Oh We Give Thanks” Rev. Tera Little, preaching NOVEMBER 15 “From Locusts to Honeybees” Rev. Tera Little, preaching NOVEMBER 22 “For this we are thankful?” Kikanza J Nuri-Robins NOVEMBER 29 “A Fish Out of Water” Kikanza J Nuri-Robins movement, “foundations put pressure on the movement to downplay more radical strategies,” writes Fincke. The Civil Rights Movement was able to raise the funds it needed from those who believed most deeply in the cause, most of whom had very limited means.
Like the Civil Rights Movement and virtually all churches, UU Santa Monica operates on the income we receive from our members and friends. Each member makes an annual commitment to donate meaningfully to our pledge income, which makes up more than three-fourths of our annual budget. Because we are an old church without a mortgage, nearly all of our expenses involve paying the wonderful people who staff our programs and maintain our infrastructure. The gasoline, batteries, and bodyguards of the early Civil Rights Movement are the salaries, supplies, and services of our church. If the members of the early Civil Rights Movement were able to support their movement from their own very modest pockets, shouldn’t we be able to do the same?
We’ll have an opportunity to talk about our involvement in Unitarian Universalism and our commitment to our church at a series of ten house parties organized by the Pledge Team in the next few weeks. It is a time for us to come together, as the people of Montgomery and Selma did, and share our personal stories about what brought us to our church, and how deeply we care about its future. I am looking forward to hosting one of these gatherings, when I will learn more about the people with whom I am building a beloved community on Sunday mornings.
My financial commitment to the Unitarian Universalist Community Church of Santa Monica supports our inspiring Sunday services, vibrant religious education programs, and social justice agenda. I’m so proud to belong to this church, and I’m happy to express my pride through an automatic monthly deduction from my bank account. I invite you to find a path to meaningful giving for the life of our church and our community.
— Abby Arnold
Heart to Heart Circles: Listen Up!
Listening is powerful. When you listen to other people, you pay value to them and make them feel more important and worthwhile. Motivational speaker Philip Hesketh says “rapt attention is the highest form of flattery.” Yet how many of us feel that we get that “rapt attention”? Most people are so concerned with their next comment that they barely listen to one another. They merely wait for an opportunity to jump in when the other person takes a breath. People tend to spend more time evaluating what the speaker is saying or mentally composing their responses than they do actually listening. Listening is what makes Heart to Heart Circles a unique church program. Here, we gather together once a month to listen to one another share from the heart. Each month we have selected readings along with questions to consider regarding a particular topic. The circles give participants time to pause, reflect, speak what’s in their heart regarding the topic, and to hold the space silent while others share their truth. It requires tremendous discipline to listen attentively without interrupting. It is challenging to turn off your own mind and direct your attention completely to another person. As with most other social skills, to master listening, practice is required.
“Listening is a very deep practice… you have to empty yourself. You have to leave space in order to listen.” —Thich Nhat Hanh
Listening builds trust. Attentive listening helps you learn more about other people. The more you listen to other people, and genuinely try to understand and empathize with them, the more you develop yourself. Each of us has something to say. Having the space to speak your truth without judgment or comment, is a gift we give to one another in Heart to Heart Circles.
Heart to Heart participants also complete two service projects as a group: one for the church community and one for the wider community. This year, registration for Heart to Heart Circles will take place during the month of December, closing on January 10. New groups for the 2016 session will begin in February. You are invited to participate!
— Rhonda Peacock
Quotes About Gratitude
Bettye Barclay has provided this list of quotes about our ministerial theme for November. Daily quotes also appear in the weekly electronic announcements.
Week 1. Gratitude is the sign of noble souls. — Aesop
Week 2. We learned about gratitude and humility – that so many people had a hand in our success, from teachers who inspired us to the janitors who kept our school clean…and we were taught to value everyone’s contribution and treat everyone with respect. — Michelle Obama
Week 3. We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives. — John F. Kennedy
Week 4. Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude. — A. A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
Week 5. For each new morning with its light. For the rest and shelter of the night, For health and food, for love and friends, For everything Thy goodness sends. — Ralph Waldo Emerson
From Our Treasurer: Defecit Spending
1. Deficit spending so far for 2015/2016
The deficit so far is $34,876. This is contrasted to our “projected” year to date deficit of $24,233. However this deficit number also includes payment for chairs in the amount of approximately $9,500 from money deducted from the facilities maintenance fund so our actual deficit to date is approximately $25,376. Even assuming that our deficit is the $25,376, one way to project our anticipated deficit by the end of June 2016 would be $101,504. This is not the only way to roughly project deficit or spending but it is one way. As a community we can expect more incoming funds after the start of our annual fall pledge drive and by year-end as some members make a one-time or year-end pledge at the end of the calendar year. However the above number is roughly twice what the congregation approved in May of 2015 as a deficit.
We are starting our annual pledge drive and I hope everyone will consider increasing their pledge by a number that is meaningful to you and your family.
2. Status of pledges
Pledges are down by approximately $14,478 adjusted for seasonal variations.
3. Reduction of our unrestricted funds In May of 2014 we had approximately $661,000 in unrestricted reserves. However in projecting what has already been spent and/ or what is now “set aside” and authorized to be spent, it appears that a reasonable projection, even if we don’t authorize another penny of spending from the unreserved funds from now until June of 2016, will be approximately $420,000. In two years we will have spent at least $240,000 of the unrestricted funds we had. While these funds are being expended as approved by either the board or the entire congregation, we are making substantial depletions of these funds on a piecemeal basis.
As of yet there is no plan in place, nor has there been in the past two to three years, as to how our congregation wants to focus our spending on unique bequests. There have been no other sizeable bequests or donations to replenish this fund. If we keep spending these unreserved funds at the same rate they will be gone in approximately 3.5 years. In my view deficit spending using reserves should only be done with a comprehensive purpose or goal such as a capital campaign, or intentionally adopting church programs and mission. For example we could use our funds to actually start and sustain a program that would help our larger community such as hunger, homelessness, or climate justice. I strongly feel that we need to bring the Committee on Money’s report to a vote so we can plan for our financial future in an intentional and consensual way.
I am always interested in talking to anyone in our community who would like to speak with me.
— Kim Miller
News & Announcements:
The 2015 Pipes Lecture was a Smash Hit
Our annual Pipes Lecture was held in the Sanctuary on October 10. It was a 60 minute presentation by an Al Gore trained Climate Reality Project facilitator, James Dusenberry. In addition, we had three guests who spoke after James had answered a number of questions. These were James Witker, who spoke about a carbon tax, as proposed by the Citizens Climate Lobby. George Shea, author of the one man performance by Mike Farrell entitled “Doctor Keeling ‘s Curve,” about a man who made the connection between carbon dioxide emissions and global warming. And, Alison Kendall, who spoke about our own Green Committee. We had about 85 in attendance and received $129 in donations. The evening was a resounding success.
— Diana Spears
Finding Our Path - 2016 Spiritual Retreat
9 January 2016
9:30am - 5pm
Temescal Canyon Gateway Park
Come spend the day in beautiful Temescal Canyon. Wander, wonder, commune, reflect. More information and registration coming in December.
Board Sponsored Town Hall Meetings
Save the Dates:
November 1, 2015
December 6, 2015
January 17, 2016
In the Sanctuary after the Second Service. Purpose: To review and discuss the Recommendations of the Committee on Money
New Meditation Series
Light To Live By, a meditation series, starts November 5, 7 pm. We will meet twice a month, on the first and third Thursday of each month, from 7 to 8:30 pm. November 5 and 19, December 3 and 17, January 7 and 21. Using the guided meditations developed by Rex Ambler, an English Quaker, our meditation time each week will consist of six periods of guided suggestions, with each one followed by 5 or 6 minutes of silence. This offers an opportunity for new awareness and an opening to our own evolving consciousness. Questions? Contact Bettye Barclay. Sign up at the Adult RE table.
Faith in Action News:
FIA leads second rally and march against L.A.P.D. killings of un-housed people
Un-housed workers and their friends are the target of harassment and killing in Venice. UU Santa Monica’s Faith in Action Commission and Peace and Social Justice Committee led a coalition of community groups August 8 and September 26 to protest this brutal treatment by the L.A.P.D. and a security guard.
Brendon Glenn, Jason Davis, and “Shakespeare” (Jascent-Jamal Lee Warren) have been killed and hundreds of un-housed people have been targeted by L.A. Sanitation Dept. sweeps of their belongings. Brendon and Jason were killed by the L.A.P.D. and Shakespeare was killed by a security guard working for the owner of the Cadillac Hotel. Weekly sweeps of the beach selectively harass un-housed people and trash their possessions. Volunteers have been monitoring these sweeps in an effort to end the harassment.
Joining us at these protests were the Committee for Racial Justice, Occupy Venice, L.A. Community Action Network (L.A. CAN), Venice Justice Committee, People Organized for Westside Renewal, People’s Liberation Unitarian Universalist Group, Anti-Racist Action-LA, Love Is the Answer, Occupy Venice, Stop Mass Incarceration Network, Idle No More Venice, and Veterans for Peace LA. On September 26, the 50 protestors (17 from UU Santa Monica) marched from the Windward traffic circle to the Townhouse Bar on Windward, where Brendon was killed, up the boardwalk to the Cadillac Hotel, then back to the L.A.P.D. substation on the beach. Residents and tourists alike responded enthusiastically to our signs and chants of Stop Racist Police Terror; Sweep up Debris, not People!; Black, Latin, Asian, White, to Smash Racism We Must Unite.
As Venice is gentrified by incoming wealthy technology professionals, working class families, especially African American and Latino, are being pushed out of the neighborhood and the number of un-housed residents is growing. The city of L.A. is doing its part to enforce anti-homeless laws without using a pledged $100 million to find or build living spaces for the 44,000 un-housed people in the city.
The Faith in Action Commission calls on the UU Santa Monica community to join us for a monthly march and rally. Our first UU principle, the inherent worth and dignity of every person, demands that we take action.
Our December newsletter article will cover the Sunday, October 25, event.
— Peggy Rhoads, Co-Chair, Peace and Social Justice Committee
Santa Monica Minimum Wage Campaign Advances
The Santa Monica City Council is preparing to vote on a comprehensive minimum wage law at its December meeting. Please print out the endorsement card below and show your support for workers. The cards can be submitted to the Faith in Action table to be forwarded to the Clergy and Laity for Economic Justice (CLUE) office, or you can email or “snail mail” them to the address listed on the card.
Dear Santa Monica Community Leaders,
The City of Santa Monica is leading the Los Angeles County cities by creating a single ordinance that will cover many key issues around the minimum wage. This is significant because all critical issues are being considered, and this will create a strong policy. On September 29, City Council instructed staff to write a comprehensive minimum wage ordinance that includes:
• Increasing the minimum wage to $15
• Paid sick leave
• Union supersession
• A hotel minimum wage overlay
• Wage enforcement
This is a really exciting moment to be a part of the Santa Monica community. We would like to compile a list of endorsements to show Council that the community supports their decision to enact a comprehensive minimum wage.
Please fill this out and send it back to us at your earliest convenience. You can mail the endorsement to 464 S. Lucas Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90017, or send it back via email to Gabriella Rosco at grosco@cluela.org.
Name:_________________________________
Organization:___________________________
Title:__________________________________
— Cathie Gentile
Splinters from the Board:
Financial Issues Dominate Board Discussions
Vice President Dan Nannini welcomed our Sabbatical Minister Tera Little to her first Board meeting with us on October 13. She expressed excitement about the opportunity to be with us over the next three months.
Dan reviewed our covenant, and the Board passed the consent agenda. The Board then discussed the plans for Town Hall Meetings to discuss with the congregation the recommendations of the Committee on Money on November 1, December 6, and January 17. The Board discussed a motion that the Board, along with the Committee on Ministry, approve the use of sabbatical funds to hire the Rev. Rick Hoyt-McDaniels to support UU Santa Monica in the creation of a plan that incorporates vision and mission into the recommendations of the Committee on Money. This motion failed.
The Board passed a motion for the Finance Committee to obtain three bids for a CPA to review our financial practices and make recommendations for financial operations that would be put in some kind of report. It was noted that there is currently no money in the budget for this, but Board members felt it would be good to get an idea of how much this would cost. The details of our financial recording sometimes change, because of the changing personnel on the Finance Committee, and everyone feels it would be better to stick with one officially sanctioned method.
Kim Miller gave the treasurer’s report, which follows this column.
Beth Brownlie gave an update on the facilities projects. We are having some problems with the irrigation system that will require expenditures from the facilities budget. Work on the Garden of Eternity will begin on Monday, October 19. Beth Brownlie proposed a method of thanking all the leaders in our congregation. Everyone was in agreement that thanking people is an excellent idea. However, there were various concerns about how best to do this. The conversation will be continued at a subsequent Board meeting.
The Board then reviewed an example of a policy about service dogs in the church. Treasurer Kim Miller offered to draft a policy that would be in compliance with California law. The Board will review this at an upcoming meeting. The Board briefly discussed the investing of a CD that matured recently. As we go forward, we would like to participate in more socially conscious investing.
— Cynthia Cottam
RE News:
From Our DRE: Let's Get to Work
What is there for me to say about this month’s congregational ministry theme — Gratitude — that isn’t so well-worn it hardly needs mentioning? As Thanksgiving approaches, we are reminded to give thanks: to our families, to our friends, to people who’ve done important things in the world, to all those who make our lives easier or bring meaning to it… and so forth. And sure, sure, we should be grateful for all the nice things we experience in our lives. How true — but how trite — this easy practice of gratitude has become. But it seems to me that authentic gratitude for the beauty and ease and joy in our lives is possible only alongside the acknowledgment that not all are given access to such beauty, ease, and joy. And I believe, too, that our UU values call us to act upon that realization. Our principles call us to walk in the world in ways that bend us ever more and ever more, by leaps and by bounds and perhaps most especially by the tiniest of everyday steps, toward justice and compassion for all.
Oh friends, we live in frightening times. We live in Ferguson and Syria and Sandy Hook, whether we plug our ears and avert our eyes or not. If there is a blessing to be found in the reporting of the news these days, perhaps it is that we are living now in a world with cell phone cameras and social media and Youtube — oh, my — which makes privileged, blissful unawareness of injustice harder to maintain. The work was always there, but now perhaps more of us are awakening to it. As broken as our world is, and as loud as the voices that speak counter to love and justice may be, I find such hope in that. I feel such gratitude for the life I have been given, so much of which came to me through no special effort or merit of my own. My belly is full. Thank you, world. My child is safe. Thank you, oh a thousand times thank you. My work is meaningful, and my hands are ready. Thank you. Let’s get to work.
Today, as I think about my time with all of you at UU Santa Monica, I am deeply grateful for this congregation’s willingness to change and grow and experiment with new ideas and new programs, as well as the commitment so many of its members show to working not only within our own walls but out in the wider world for justice. I have served this congregation as DRE for twelve years now—what a gift that is! Thank you for walking with me on this journey, friends. It’ll never get old.
The closing words we say every week in our 11am RE class are: “We are Unitarian Universalists with minds that think, hearts that love, and hands that are ready to help. Together we work for peace and friendship in our world.” This community of faith that we have built together isn’t just for our own benefit—this is where we can come together for an hour on Sunday mornings to find inspiration and companionship for what the world desperately needs of us: to love generously, seek truth, and serve the world. We have so much to be grateful for. Let’s put that gratitude to work, my friends.
— Catherine Farmer Loya
Adult RE
Exploration is an important continuing part of our adult lives as Unitarian Universalists. By learning, discovering new perspectives, and working towards deeper understanding of ourselves, one another, and our world, we grow as individuals. We also gain new tools and insights as part of a larger movement of people seeking peace and justice. These are UU Santa Monica’s fall workshops and discussion groups currently meeting or beginning soon:
• Light Group Meditation — The 7 UU Principles and the Palestine-Israel Conflict
• Long Strange Trip: Video Series on UU History
• Last Conversations Ongoing groups meeting regularly throughout the year:
• Patio Chat: Discuss ministerial themes, sermons, and related topics between services.
• Writers Group: Stretch your literary muscles in a safe and supportive atmosphere.
And here are some offerings to look for in the New Year — Winter/Spring 2016
• The Jefferson Bible
• Building Your Own Theology: Introduction
• Foundational UU Texts: Emerson’s “Divinity School Address,” James Luther Adams’s “A Faith for the Free”
• “This Changes Everything: Capitalism vs. The Climate” Book Discussion
• Joseph Campbell’s “The Power of Myth”: Our Myths, Our Future
• Building Your Own Theology — Ethics - Understanding the Bible?
Additionally:
• The 2015-2016 Common Read: “Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption,” by Bryan Stevenson. Book groups TBA.
• Neighboring Faiths: All are welcome to accompany the RE participants and their parents on visits to other faith communities. This year’s exploration theme is Eastern Religions. Each program is related to one or more of our seven core religious exploration topics:
• Unitarian Universalism, Jewish and Christian Heritage, World Religions, Personal/Spiritual Growth, Spiritual Practices, Peace and Justice, The Interdependent Web
Are you interested in facilitating your own class or discussion group? You’re welcome to fill out a UU Santa Monica Adult Programs Proposal and submit it to Catherine Farmer Loya. The Adult Programs Subcommittee will review it and, if approved, work with you to schedule and promote your program.
For more information, stop by the RE table in Forbes Hall or speak to a member of the Adult Programs Subcommittee (Natalie Kahn, Dan Patterson, Sarah Robson, James Witker) and check this space in the months ahead!
Wherever your interest leads you, we welcome you to a new year of exploration here at UU Santa Monica.
— James Witker
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Our Whole Lives (affectionately known as OWL) is a unique, holistic lifespan sexuality education program grounded in the belief that honest, accurate information about sexuality changes lives. Developed jointly by the United Church of Christ and the Unitarian Universalist Association, OWL was launched nationally in 1999. Its lifespan scope encompasses five levels: K to 1st Grade; 5th to 6th grades; 7th to 9th grades; 10th to 12th grades; and adults. OWL’s approach is comprehensive: going beyond identifying body parts to include relationships and personal skills in addition to sexual health and behavior. OWL addresses decision-making, clarifies values, builds interpersonal skills, and deepens understanding of spiritual, emotional, and societal aspects of sexuality, which can influence the decisions we make. Its “three Rs” are Responsibility, Respect, and Relationships. UU Santa Monica is one of the only churches in the area to offer all five OWL modules in a two-year rotation. (Information from www.uua.org/re/owl) |
The OWL (Our Whole Lives) program is 15 years old!
In January 2000, UU Santa Monica offered its first OWL class. With four facilitators and nine youth, the first group was for 7th and 8th graders. It was a wild success, and UU Santa Monica has offered OWL classes ever since. Beth Rendeiro coordinated and co-facilitated that first group and has continued coordinating and facilitating UU Santa Monica OWL classes, and participating in OWL at the national level. In honor of its 15th year, Sabina Mayo-Smith interviewed Beth Rendeiro about why OWL is such a special and important program.
SMS: Beth, how did you get involved with OWL?
BR: In September 1999, the UU Santa Monica Director of Religious Education at the time, Judy Tomlinson, asked me if I would be interested in applying to a training to facilitate a brand new sexuality education program called Our Whole Lives. Judy knew that I worked at Planned Parenthood. I applied to be a trainer, was accepted, and I have been coordinating and co-facilitating OWL classes at UU Santa Monica ever since. We started with one class for 7th to 9th graders, and over time, added four other classes for other age groups, which we continue to offer over a two-year cycle.
SMS: When did you realize that OWL was something special?
BR: I realized it with our first group. I saw that the youth in the group were very involved and interested in what we had to share. Kids like to talk about these issues. After the first OWL class ended, the youth asked if they could continue to meet with us. Two facilitators agreed and we met once per month on a Friday night at my house for the next three years! Sometimes they would bring their friends because they thought they would enjoy and benefit from the discussions. Working with OWL continues to be profound and meaningful for those of us who volunteer with the program. Volunteering with OWL requires a lot of time and dedication. Yet, three of the four original facilitators still work with OWL, and one of our first youth participants is now being trained as an OWL facilitator in Oregon!
SMS: Not all UU congregations have an OWL program. Why do you think OWL is important for UU Santa Monica to sponsor?
BR: I believe OWL is part of a holistic ministry that allows us to consider fundamental aspects of what it means to be human. OWL incorporates the core values of our UU faith. It highlights our connection and integration as human beings. And we are all so grateful for the church’s commitment to OWL these last 15 years. The church has offered financial, logistical, and ideological support that has allowed us to offer a comprehensive, life-span program led by trained, committed volunteers.
SMS: Why is OWL such a powerful program?
BR: Sexuality is a big part of who we are as humans. It is also a big part of the culture. The discussions we have with children as part of OWL are meaningful to their families too. In three OWL age groups, we also have parent participation. This gives both children and parents a chance to think about sexuality in age-appropriate ways and open a dialogue that can be difficult to broach. OWL provides information. It provides awareness of both individual and cultural aspects of sexuality, and it is a safe place for participants to practice decision-making.
SMS: Why is OWL an exceptional program?
BR: All of us who are involved with OWL have found it relevant and meaningful both to us and the participants. And the information is developmentally right on. It is very unusual for a sexuality education program to look at the human lifespan and to address the needs of different age groups. OWL offers participants something they can easily integrate into their lives outside of church. It helps them look at the world through a different lens.
OWL Facilitators
UU Santa Monica’s current OWL facilitators are:
Francois Bar
Alan Brunell
Karen Canady
Kathy Cook
Tom Early
Leon Henderson-MacLennan
Stanley Johnston
Dan Nannini
Karen Patterson
Buudha Quant
Amy Thiele
Linda van Ligten
Steve and Sylvia Young
Retired: Sue Bickford, Cynthia Cottam, Carl Hoppe, Victor Paddock
(About to be trained next month): Vicky Foxworth, Mike Monte
Thank you from all of us for your dedication and hard work!
UU Santa Monica is hosting a regional OWL facilitators’ training on November 5 to 7 to work with the 7th to 9th grade and 10th to 12th grade modules.
If you are interested in more information about the Our Whole Lives program you can find it at http://www.uua.org/re/owl
Friendly Beasts
Once again, our preschool through elementary-aged children will sing “The Friendly Beasts” song at our holiday pageant on Sunday, December 20, at both services. As in years past, all involved children will sing the first and last verses of the song. Small groups of children will sing the middle five verses, dressed in a costume appropriate to the animals speaking in that verse (brown donkeys, red and white cows, dogs, doves, or mice). Our preschoolers sing the mice verse, and the older children pick which of the other animals they want to be.
We have costumes for our Beasts from previous years. Older kids who don’t want to dress as an animal but do want to sing are welcome to be shepherds. Religious Exploration teachers and parents, please note: I will lead Sunday rehearsals (about 10 minutes long) that occur in the RE classrooms during both services. Below is the rehearsal schedule, including a dress rehearsal that occurs Saturday morning, December 19, just after the RE Pancake Breakfast.
November 8 Preschoolers to grade 5: 10 minutes each classroom
November 15 Preschoolers to grade 5: 10 minutes each classroom
November 22 Preschoolers to grade 5: 10 minutes each classroom
November 29 Group rehearsal for all at RE beginning
December 6 Preschoolers to grade 5: 10 minutes each classroom
December 13 Group rehearsal for all at RE beginning
December 19 (Saturday) RE Pancake Breakfast at 8 am in Forbes Hall, Friendly Beast dress rehearsal in Sanctuary from 9:30 am to 10:30 am, and more fun (including a Bounce House) for the kids after the rehearsal! December 20 Pageant! (both services)
Call or email me with questions. I look forward to working with your friendly beasts once again this year!
— Kris Langabeer
Music News:
From Our Director of Music: I am so grateful for the opportunity to be in community with you
Charles Haskell has been asking me for more than three years if I would write something about the Music Program for the monthly newsletter. Someday, I promise, I will do that. Today is not that day, as it turns out... However, as my focus has turned toward worship preparations for November and our month of “Gratitude,” several thoughts and questions crossed my mind about our community here. So, I have set up a playlist of Vivaldi’s Concerto for Guitar and Strings in D Major, Lauridsen’s Lux Aeterna, and Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue, and am now ready to write.
The first questions that emerge are, “Why are they (you) here?” “Why are there so many people that give so much of their (your) lives and livelihoods for the sake of this church?” “Why do they (you) keep showing up?” The obvious and rather bland answer, of course, is that this is extremely important to all of you. But, I sense this goes deeper. So, I start to recall some of the many conversations I have had with some of you when you have told me bits and pieces of your stories — what your life was like before you came to the church however long ago, what initially drew you to the congregation, what sorts of involvement you have had since joining, and so on. It then occurs to me that this is all about expressing gratitude. You have told me time and again about the various ways the church has served you, and I believe you are now acting out of gratitude to ensure this beloved institution survives to serve others.
I begin to wonder though, as the years have (in varying pace) danced along, if the gratefulness that has fed such imperative industry has sometimes transitioned subconsciously into a fear of losing what has been established. And, recognizing that the church is as much the place we gather as it is the we that have gathered, I wonder if our expressions of gratitude have become confused into expressions of fear. Do we approach our activity in the church with an attitude of “I am grateful you are here for me,” or “I have worked so hard to help build you, and I am afraid you are changing?” Likewise, do we greet each other with a spirit of “I am so grateful for the opportunity to be in community with you,” or “you are welcome in my home, but please remember it is my home?” Have we become possessive of this bounty such that there is no more room in the inn? Being myself extremely grateful that each of you pledges and pays of yourselves to secure that I have a place of employment that values my personhood as much as my professional contribution, I can clearly see the temptation. However, I have persuaded myself that despite whatever needs taking a position here once fulfilled, it is now my turn to do what I can to guarantee that those in the communities around us searching for an oasis of love, respect, dignity, worth, and solidarity have a comfortable seat when they stumble into our halls. I have convinced myself that whatever sentimentality I hold for those notverylongago early days is not worth the sacrifice of losing the battle for others. I have been served, so shall they also be.
I am grateful for each of you. I am thankful for your love and support of beauty in our worship. I am also grateful for each of my colleagues. They are masters not only of their disciplines but of collaboration, creativity, and generosity. And, I am grateful for all of the nexttimes I see you, when our eyes and smiles will express gratitude for our very togetherness.
— DeReau K. Farrar, Director of Music